Discouragement and Hope --

It is amazing to me how many ups and downs I experience each week. I have such a sense of hope at times, then I feel knocked down by depression or discouragement. I may feel helpless and overwhelmed at times due to the immense pain and suffering in Philippi but before too long I experience a joy and peace in God as He reminds me of His sovereignty.

This Week:

Discouragement--

1. Holding little Sinoxolo at orphan support group last week and hearing her raspy breathing and seeing her lack of energy. I am so hurt and angry that she was born with AIDS and has never had a chance to live a normal, healthy, life. She didn't choose all of this, and never did anything to deserve such a painful life. It just doesn't seem fair! I get so sad (and sometimes even mad) seeing her suffer and seeing her thin frame struggling to participate in activities with the other kids. Please continue to pray for Sinoxolo's emotional and spiritual health.

2. Melikaya. "Meli" is a 14 year-old boy who has been attending our orphan support group. He is not an orphan, however. He was asked to join the group because his mom is currently dying of HIV/AIDS and it was thought that the support of the other kids would be good for him during this hard time. He has been feeling a lot of pressure lately, especially financial pressure, as he tries to sort out where money for schooling, food, and clothes will come from. His mom is obviously unable to work at this stage. Recently he approached Matthew, one of the other staff members, with tears in his eyes asking for some money for schooling. My heart just goes out to him, as no child should have to carry such weight and responsibility, especially while trying to deal with his mothers impending death. Please pray for Meli's heart and mind as he deals with such a tough situation. Please pray for the finances of this family and for wisdom and strength for Meli.

3. Break-in. Last night our "Kombi" (VW van) got broken into. We were parked at a friends house and someone broke the window of the van and attempted to remove the CD/stereo system. The alarm started going off and this must have caused the person to run. It was scary to go out and see the shattered window and the CD system pulled half-way out. Nothing else was stolen, and the window is easily replaceable, but I still felt angry and a bit scared. I guess it served as a great reminder that South Africa is not safe and I have to be more careful and aware than I would be at home. Please pray for our safety (especially as we travel in and out of Philippi)

Hope

1. Sinoxolo's smile. AIDS has not totally prevented Sinoxolo from experiencing joy and happiness. Her smile is a source of inspiration and joy in my life. This past Friday I found a huge ring of keys that lies around in the church where we meet for orphan support group. I took one of the keys from the giant key ring and gathered Sinoxolo up in my arms and pretended to be "unlocking" her from the side-- all the while purposefully tickling her with the tip of the key. We laughed together as she grabbed the keys from my hand and fought to keep me from getting them back. Eventually, she just rested in my arms and was content just laying there for about 15 minutes. She doesn't speak much English, and my Xhosa is very limited, so we didn't talk much, but yet shared a lot in that time. I was thankful for those moments with her.

2. Poetry by Melikaya. I was so touched and encouraged to read the following poem that Melikaya wrote to his mother. It is clear there is a deep love in that relationship. I praise God for that love!

Loving You Mom

"As I walked one morning
I heard people talk and talk
And never say a word
Some people look at you
And the birds begin to sing

Some people laugh and laugh
And yet you want to cry
Some people touch your hand
And love fills your heart

I'll love you Mom, I'll love you
Till China and Africa meet
And the river jumps over mountains
And the birds sing hosanna

I'll love you till the ocean
Is folded and the rain is dry
And the seven stars of love
Is shining like your heart."

3. God is good! I am so thankful that He is in control and that he is our ever-present and eternal HOPE in the midst of hard and discouraging situations. I am sometimes amazed at how much he cares for us. I think of the Psalmist who wrote, "Who am I that you would be mindful of me?" He created the heavens, yet cares about the smallest details and concerns in our lives. Wow!

Thank you for your continued prayers.

Love,

Jen

Going Out Into the Community

Last Wednesday was a very big day! We have been meeting with a new group of CHE's (Community Health Evangelists) for about a month now. There are 15 of these volunteers who come on Wednesday mornings and close to 30 who come on Wednesday afternoons to receive lessons on physical, emotional, and spiritual health. So, a total of about 45 volunteer CHE's have been equipped this past month with information on physical health topics such as tuberculosis, worms, and diarrhea; and spiritual lessons on developing a relationship with God, prayer, and discipleship. Last week we taught lessons on home-visiting, grief counseling, and reflective listening. These lessons were in preparation for the "sending out" into the community that is occurring this week. Each CHE was encouraged to think about surrounding shacks that they would feel comfortable visiting each week. The success of the CHE program really lies in relationship-building and the spreading of vital information through these relationships. In Philippi, stopping into a neighbors home is not at all uncommon, simply to chat or say "hi". The shacks are all so close together in this community. Now, the CHE's (who are equipped to share simple home remedies for diarrhea, ways to prevent getting worms, and how to grow in your relationship with God) are dispersing into the community! Each CHE is going to eventually be visiting 10-15 shacks per week and hopefully developing deep relationships with those living in each one of those shacks.

I am not very good at math, but even I can see the potential for overall health improvements in the community of Philippi through the CHE program. (45 trained CHE's) x (up to 15 shacks visited) = 675 shacks being visited each week by knowledgeable CHE's. Shacks in Philippi are usually quite overcrowded, packed with many people living in each one. If there are an average of 5 people living in each shack that is visited (which is a low estimate) than the 45 CHE's in Philippi have the potential to make a positive impact in 3,375 people's lives!

Please pray for the CHE volunteers this week as they begin making home visits as trained CHE's. Pray that deep relationships would be formed in the weeks and months ahead and that physical health improvements would be evident along with real spiritual growth and discipleship.

Pointing in the right direction ---->

To the left you see Ezile, one of the youngest orphans who comes to the support group on Fridays. She is a fireball of endless energy and enthusiasm. Lately, I have noticed something ironic and quite amazing. I came to South Africa to help the orphans grow in their relationship with God and try to do everything in my power to direct them closer to the Father, however, I have found that little Ezile and the other orphans have been the ones helping me grow and pointing me in the right direction (closer to God). Though I trust that the orphans have been learning and growing as well, I have been struck by all they have to teach (whether they are aware of it or not)!

I have been thinking a lot lately about the simplicity of these kids' faith. When we tell them stories about Jesus' life they are not prone to ask question after question, trying to analyze the probability of historical accuracy of the particular occurrence. No, they simply trust. I know it is important to be discerning and wise in our quest for Truth, and that sometimes means questioning and probing deeper, but there is something to be said for the child-like faith and trust that these orphans demonstrate. They believe. They trust. It is as simple as that.

I think that sometimes we spend too much time and energy focusing on what we believe when we should be spending the time and energy thinking about how we live-- and actually living in a way that is pleasing to God. I think God cares more about how we are loving our neighbor than if we have worked out for ourselves a solid, impenetrable, theological framework. In this sense, the kids have gotten it right (and I, so often, get it wrong.) Christianity is about loving God and loving our neighbors. It is about faith, and trust. I pray we can all, by the grace of God, obtain a more child-like faith. I am thankful for precious Ezile who helps point me, and all of us, in the right direction!

Match Made In HEAVEN!!!

On this Valentines Day, 2006, I want to tell a touching story of matchmaking that I share as a praise to God for His unending faithfulness and provision. There are three people involved in this story; all in need of love. First, let me tell you about Asanda...

Asanda (pictured on the right) is 17 years old. She is an orphan who has been attending the orphan support group. She has had an incredibly difficult year. Her mom was diagnosed with HIV/AIDS and she and her dad together cared for her mom. One night as Asanda's dad was coming home from work he witnessed a rape and tried to intervene and stop it. He was killed. Shortly after her dad's death Asanda's mom also passed away. During the time that all of this was happening, Asanda was in the beginning stages of pregnancy. Asanda gave birth to a healthy little girl (top left photo) in August. As of last week, Asanda wasn't enrolled in school, had no diapers or food for the baby, and was living alone in a shack without even a mattress to sleep on. Bridges of Hope desperately wanted to step in and help Asanda and her baby, but has committed to not sponsor a child without a responsible adult care-giver also living in the home. This is in order to make sure the funds are responsibly spent and to try and discourage child-headed households. So, we started praying that a caregiver would step up who would be willing to move into Asanda's shack with she and her baby. We were also praying that Asanda would be excited about this potential caregiver moving in. God answered our prayers...
Mama Lulama has been involved with Bridges of Hope's beading microbusiness for quite some time. She is living with HIV/AIDS in a small shack that is too small to fit two parked cars inside of it. With its rickety tin-roof the shack is roasting in the summer under the hot sun and very cold and wet in the winter rainy season. Lulama lives alone. When approached and asked about the possibility of moving in with Asanda, Lulama's eyes lit up. She is a loving, nurturing, compassionate, woman who saw an opportunity to move out of her small shack and into Asanda's bigger shack where she could really help another person and make a positive impact in Asanda's life. Asanda was also excited about having Mama Lulama as a caregiver. In a meeting that was held, Lulama told Asanda, "Now... I am a very nice woman... BUT... I will not let you do whatever you want!!!" This really brought us a sense of relief because, truly, this is what Asanda needs. Love and discipline. A parental figure. Someone who will take some of the burdens off of Asanda and allow her to be a kid again.
This has been such a neat development, one that I really believe was orchestrated by the Divine Conductor. It is an answer to prayer. An American donor has stepped up and committed to support the household financially. Asanda is now enrolled in school, the baby is in day care, the shack is furnished, and everyone living in the shack is well-fed and provided for. Please pray that this transition would go smoothly (as it has so far) and that Asanda and Lulama would come to really love each other. Pray that Asanda would have a soft, humble, heart and be open to having a "mother" figure in her life again after living on her own for quite some time.

Thank you, Lord, for being so good! Thank you for meeting our needs in ways that we couldn't even imagine. Thank you for working for good in a world that is full of pain and heartache. Thank you for your deep, unconditional, love for us.

On this Valentine's Day may we reflect on the love that our Father has for us, and how we can spread God's love to those around us!

Please Pray for Sinoxolo

In Xhosa, the word "Sinoxolo" means "peace be with you." This is an accurate description of who Sinoxolo is-- a person who spreads peace and love to those around her. She is a sweet and sensitive 10-year-old who has a smile that can light up a room and heart-warming hugs that she gives freely and frequently! She truly brings a "peace" that is evident when she enters a room.

She and her two older brothers attend the orphan support group that meets every Friday. My heart has been heavy for Sinoxolo as she is getting increasingly thin and has been sick for quite some time. Sinoxolo has AIDS. She contracted it from her mother who died not too long ago. Last week I stooped down to give her a hug and felt as if I were wrapping my arms around a skeleton. This is very hard and scary. She has been too weak to participate in many of the activities at group, and last week she sat limply on my lap while the others played.

In Philippi, only those that have progressed to stage 4 of AIDS are eligible to take ARV's. Sinoxolo has been at stage 4 for a while now and has been taking these "cocktails" which are supposed to help build up her immune system. We noticed her getting significantly stronger when she first started taking these drugs and she was even able to go back to school. Only recently have we seen her losing a lot of weight and getting weaker. Please pray that these drugs will really boost her immune system and allow her to gain strength and put on weight. Please pray for her emotional health and she tries to cope with this life-threatening disease and deal with constantly being sick and weak. Please pray for friends who will encourage her and for her aunt who is her primary caregiver. Pray that God would heal her little body and restore her to health. Pray that she would know and feel God's presence with her.

Thank you for your prayers!